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Matthew Ritter's avatar

This comedy clip plays with the concept with a concrete example: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owI7DOeO_yg

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Ben's avatar

This was a wonderfully-written article, thank you Sam. My partner and I had a long and fruitful discussion about our communication styles and preferences, and they mentioned a few new thoughts that I'm sharing now:

There's another reason to refuse the d-decouple, which is to avoid reinforcing dominant narratives in ones own self. We all have implicit bias, and it takes a lot of work to push against the dominant narratives that our implicit bias is reinforcing. So let's say society is constantly sending me the message that a certain group is worse in some way, but the truth is that they probably aren't. By accepting a d-decouple on that topic, it might be harmful to me by reinforcing the default beliefs I'm already having trouble pushing against.

One last thought. My partner suggested that we decouple when we engage with immersive fiction. From my own personal experience, I find that I'm happier and engage with the world in better ways when I'm reading books or playing games that depict a better world. This might not generalize to others, but I can't help but compare it against the above concept of decoupling.

Thanks again for a really lovely post. I'm now a happy subscriber.

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